Utah's Attorney General, Mark Shurtleff

It's campaign season and candidates are making their rounds. Mark Shurtleff came to our office earlier this week to make a presentation and solicit our votes. I wasn't expecting much from an incumbent ahead in the polls, but he did impress me. A lot of the services they offer are on the web and I've actually signed up for a thing or two. I thought you might want to check it out also.

Amber Alerts:

http://www.wirelessamberalerts.org/

Child Protection Agency:

http://www.utahkidsregistry.com/

Internet Safety:

http://www.netsmartz.org/

http://www.webwisekids.org/

Youth Access to Alcohol:

http://www.parentsempowered.org/

Crime Reports:

http://www.crimereports.com/

ID Theft Reporting:

http://www.idtheft.utah.gov/

Official Website of the AG:

http://www.attorneygeneral.utah.gov/

Shurtleff's Campaign Site:

http://www.shurtleff2008.com/

No "Rebel Yell"

One night only, Hard Rock Cafe, Las Vegas ... Billy Idol! In a few hours fans will be crying, "More, more, more", instead I'm crying "Big River" and remembering Johnny Cash on the anniversary of his death. I guess it was pretty much decided that I wouldn't be going when I scraped my car against that pole the other day. Still, it would've been fun to just jump on a plane, go to the concert and fly back ... totally life of a rock star. Oh well ... not if you don't have the money rock stars have.

Wet Pants

My friend, Anya, sent this yesterday as my terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day came to an end. What perfect timing.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Come with me to a third grade classroom ... There is a nine-year-old kid sitting at his desk and all of a sudden, there is a puddle between his feet and the front of his pants are wet. He thinks his heart is going to stop because he cannot possibly imagine how this has happened. It's never happened before, and he knows that when the boys find out he will never hear the end of it. When the girls find out, they'll never speak to him again as long as he lives.

The boy believes his heart is going to stop; he puts his head down and prays this prayer, "Dear God, this is an emergency! I need help now! Five minutes from now I'm dead meat."

He looks up from his prayer and here comes the teacher with a look in her eyes that says he has been discovered.

As the teacher is walking toward him, a classmate named Susie is carrying a goldfish bowl that is filled with water. Susie trips in front of the teacher and inexplicably dumps the bowl of water in the boy's lap.

The boy pretends to be angry, but all the while is saying to himself, "Thank you, Lord! Thank you, Lord!"

Now all of a sudden, instead of being the object of ridicule, the boy is the object of sympathy. The teacher rushes him downstairs and gives him gym shorts to put on while his pants dry out. All the other children are on their hands and knees cleaning up around his desk. The sympathy is wonderful. But as life would have it, the ridicule that should have been his has been transferred to someone else - Susie

She tries to help, but they tell her to get out. "You've done enough, you klutz!"

Finally, at the end of the day, as they are waiting for the bus, the boy walks over to Susie and whispers, "You did that on purpose, didn't you?" Susie whispers back, "I wet my pants once too."

May God help us see the opportunities that are always around us to do good.

Note: I'm praying for someone to hit my car on the side I scraped ... and have their insurance cover the cost of repair.

Inge and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day

I slept through the alarms and woke up at 9:00. I called work and notified the receptionist that I'll be coming in late and she offered to notify my bosses and the office manager. On my way out of the condo complex, I realized that I had left my lunch on the counter at home. I could tell it was going to be a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.

I went back to get my lunch and in my haste to get in and out the door, I scraped my car against a pole. Now the rear passenger door and the side panel is damaged. One of the lenses popped out of my sunglasses. I want to move to Australia.

I got in to work 45 minutes late. The receptionist told me that she forgot to send out the email notifying my bosses and the office manager that I'm coming in late. My bosses were not happy that I showed up late without "calling in". I was late turning in my timesheet and I'll be working through lunch to make up for coming in late. I'm having a terrible, horrible, no good very bad day and I wish I'm in Australia.

I needed a Dove dark chocolate ... the quote inside my wrapper said "Flirting is mandatory". Yeah, the way this day is going I'll be flirting with danger/disaster. I found Alexander's story online, but my real player won't work, but if I remember right ... terrible, horrible, no good, very bad days happen ... even in Australia.

Note: Link to the online story of Alexander by clicking on the blog title.

Don't park here!

Went to dinner with Kay Lynn last night. I noticed the sign and busted out laughing. I hope it's effective.

Oh, my poem, "The Tainted Woman", applied to me again last night ... chocolate cake on my pink sweater.

Update from Elder Folau

I received this update from Elder Folau today. He looks happy (that kid is always smiling) and doing so well. I can't help but be so proud of him. I burst into laughter seeing the picture of him having tea with a group of girls. Classic Lono ...

His lambs hear his voice and follow. It´s a week of miracles. We are seeing more blessings than we ask for. We got some of our investigadors baptized and also ate a lot of corn this week. Time flies and a lot of work to do. Our Stake might get divided soon maybe in March. I won´t be here to see it but I´ll do all that I can to help while I can. Hope the best for everyone. Obedience brings the blessings. Elder Folau

Salt Lake Greek Festival ... OPA!!!

Hand stamp that seem to be semi-permanent. Yummy kalamaria (I got two servings), gyro, spanakopita, and baklavas. Beautiful Greek Orthodox Church. I'm all about supporting the community.

Carwash Blues

Tuesday (09/02 -- After work): Hmmm. The rainy weekend certainly made my car dirty, especially the windows. Go to a brushless carwash and clean it up a bit before heading home.

Wednesday (09/03 -- After work): What is up with the water spots? I hope they're not permanent. The dinner at my boss' house is tomorrow night, better take it to a carwash and see if I can get the spots off and make it look pretty. Spray, spray, spray, brush, brush, brush, spray, spray, spray, squeegee, wipe, squeegee, wipe. Good job. Wouldn't be ashamed of having Chloe seen by the attorneys who'll be at the dinner party tomorrow night.

Thursday (09/04 -- After the dinner party): Should I take I-80 or should I go through town to get home? It's already after 9:00. I wonder what McCaine had to say ... better take the freeway. I hate this luge of a freeway and can't wait for all these repairs and construction to be over. Massive puddle in the middle of I-80? Great, add another hazzard on to the luge, why don't you? Slow down. ARGH! The car next to me zoomed by and splashed through the puddle. Thick muck all over my beautiful clean car! JERK! Wait ... Ewww! What is that smell? Is that sewage? Crap! Alright, kind of late, but I'll take the car through a quick brushless wash. I don't want whatever is on the car to harden or smell that all day tomorrow. Swoosh, swoosh, swoosh, spray, spray, spray ... I wonder if there's enough pressure to get all that muck off? Whatever! I'm tired. Should be good enough. Too dark outside and no one around at the carwash. Don't know if it's safe. I'll just go home and give it a quick wipe down. Zoom, zoom. What is this? Not sewage, but it's white and powdery ... and smells sulfuric ... that can't be good.

I guess I'll be spending more money tomorrow to get it cleaned up. Do I dare wash it ... again? It'll probably rain on me or it'll be a casualty of a mad sprinkler or another puddle of muck. Why do I bother?

Kissing Rugby [Email Thread]

Sidney: The bishop mentioned this "sport" but did not say how it was played. Does anybody know about this?

Inge: I've heard of the game, but have no idea how it is played. Is it similar to flag football, except you steal a kiss instead of grabbing the flags attached to the players?

Sidney: Hmmmm ... no idea. Thanks for your guess. My first and only thought was that one cold sore could bring down the whole ward!

Inge: No kidding. Also, depending on who else is playing and what kind of a kiss, I may be tempted to not run with the ball and just let certain people catch me to kiss me ... that would make for a really boring football game ...

HOURS LATER …

Inge: Okay, so things slowed down a bit this afternoon at work. I googled "Kissing Rugby" and one of the results yielded this:

"Kissing rugby is an aggressive sport where rug burns are as common as kissing. It's played with a large group of boys and girls. Each boy gets a number assigned to him and the girls are assigned letters. Everyone makes a circle with boys on one side, girls on the other. Someone gets in the middle and calls out a number and a letter (i.e. D--5) and then "D" and "5" enter the circle and attack the member of the opposite sex. If a girl is in the middle to start then the boy "5" attacks her while the girl "D" attacks "5." A point is scored when either "D" or "5" lands a kiss anywhere on the face (ears count) of the other person. Whoever is kissed has to remain in the middle, call out a number and a letter, and avoid getting kissed in the next round."

"Attacks" sounds painful and illegal to me ... and why would you try to "avoid getting kissed"? I thought that was the whole purpose of the game.

Note: Talk about mixed signals! First you're attacking them and then you run away ... people are going to need some serious meds after playing this game ... and possibly a restraining order.

My Own Hallmark Store

I'm guilty of this. I have boxes of cards that I keep at my desk. Unless it is totally spot on for some people, you know it's a last minute card from me if the card is not one I personally made. Ooops ... maybe I shouldn't have disclosed that.