Being silly ...
Tracie and Darren
Inge and Marianne
and plow into a parked car. ~ Evan Davis
Roz: Ever heard of Lupe Velez?
Frasier: Who?
Roz: Lupe Velez, the movie star in the '30s. Well, her career hit the skids, so she decided she'd make one final stab at immortality. She figured if she couldn't be remembered for her movies, she'd be remembered for the way she died. And all Lupe wanted was to be remembered. So, she plans this lavish suicide - flowers, candles, silk sheets, white satin gown, full hair and makeup, the works. She takes the overdose of pills, lays on the bed, and imagines how beautiful she's going to look on the front page of tomorrow's newspaper. Unfortunately, the pills don't sit well with the enchilada combo plate she sadly chose as her last meal. She stumbles to the bathroom, trips and goes head-first into the toilet, and that's how they found her.Frasier: Is there a reason you're telling me this story?
Roz: Yes. Even though things may not happen like we planned, they can work out anyway.Frasier: Remind me again how it worked for Lupe, last seen with her head in the toilet.Roz: All she wanted was to be remembered. Will you ever forget that story?
I first met Shannon at work. When we were introduced, she was surprised that a Chinese-Indonesian would have such a Scandanavian name. I told her that I look forward to dressing up one Halloween to look just like her -- blonde, blue-eyed Swede -- to match my name. We got along nicely, became friends and over time I nicknamed her "IKEA" because she is so Swedish looking. She would even respond when I greet her with an, "Holla, IKEA." Shannon left the firm last fall and despite best efforts, we lost touch.
Let me just start by saying that I love the Eagles! Well, they're performing tomorrow night in Salt Lake. I so wanted to go, but when I checked a few months ago, tickets were $75 and up. While I was willing to fork out that much for semi-decent seats, I couldn't find a single person willing to spend that kind of money to go with me. A friend checked on the price earlier this week and the only tickets left are the $175 ones. Too rich for my blood. Why do they have to charge so much? They're making it harder for people to appreciate their music ...
X: So, what's going on that's exciting?
Me: Not a whole lot with me.
X: There must be something ...
Me: Nope.
X: I wonder if I should bring this up. No, I shouldn't. Well, maybe I should ...
Me: What?
X: No, I shouldn't.
Me: Okay, whatever. [I ignore him and start talking to my co-worker]
X: Well, okay, I'll ask you ... So, according to Mormon doctrine, there are different places for a person to go after this life. Is spirit prison hell?
Me: Uh, no! People there are being preached to and it's a temporary state until they accept the Gospel.
X: Correct. So what is hell? [This is the part where I should have answered, "This conversation with you is hell", but I didn't]
Me: I would imagine that outer darkness would fit the definition of hell better than spirit prison ...
X: Correct! So who goes there?
Me: Murderers, adulterers, unrepentant ...
X: Right again ... well, I just thought I'd provide the topic of conversation ... g'night!
Me: What the hell?